white out his eyes and call him tron cat .
Reblogged from: rachelclaired
Source: andrewbreitel
i asked God “please just let this last until i don’t hurt anymore” …
i thought that would be a long time but it didn’t take long for me to get strong again . it was almost a test the way everything happened today . i admit , i did cry . but only a little . and i can honestly say that i’m not heartbroken . i admit , i am hurt . but it’s not like “a life-lesson” type hurt . you just really hurt my feelings . lol i at least thought you’d consider my feelings if you decided to forget my heart . even though i have successfully pulled an all-nighter because i can’t sleep , i don’t think it’s because i’m sad ; my mind just has a lot to say .
but my prayers were answered . the internal sadness and most of the pain seemed to have merely vanished , just today . it may have happened a long time ago , but it took this for me to realize it . whenever something like this happens i want to run back to my first love , but i’m starting to realize that he is so over me and i need to let go to . and surprisingly , i’m ok with it .
i’m starting to realize that my time with you now is limited and it hurts . to be totally honest , i didn’t plan on falling so hard for you . i don’t think i’ve fallen completely . but i’m definitely falling fast . i planned on summer coming and i not have to worry about you , but i can already tell that it’s gonna be hard . i’ll miss laying with you , i’ll miss talking with you , i’ll miss touching you , i’ll miss being with you . so i hope these last few weeks move as slow as possible . and i hope we share some good times . but this summer will be ours , together or apart .
i found this saved as a note in my phone . well not really found . i knew it was there . but reading it now is crazy . those last weeks went by so fast . i wonder if things would be different if i said this to you before . i wonder if you would have told me how you really felt then instead of now . because now was the wrong time . because i can’t get to you . and understand you . and look you in your eyes and make you talk to me . but you’ve shut me out . like the rest of your world . and it hurts . i couldn’t expect me to be an exception even if you did say you loved me . i find it hard to trust anybody . so i can’t say you betrayed my trust . but there’s a recurring theme in my love life . someone else is always better , even when i give my all . and it hurts . it all happened so fast but i feel like it was forever . as much as your friendship meant to me , i can’t get a genuine apology from you other than an “i’m sorry g . i didn’t want to have to tell you this way .” no matter how hard i try to be a cold-hearted bitch , i’ll always be a fragile lovedrunk who’ll give her left arm to just be eternally happy . even though i wallow in drugs and alcohol and live off of being young , wild , and free to keep my mind off of things , i’m always tempted by a sweet smile and a promise to “never hurt me” .
but i’m alive .
it’s over .
it’s really day 3 .
why do you still have a picture of you and your ex kissing in your profile pictures album ?
that’s all for today .
